1
00:00:03,914 --> 00:00:05,134
Jenna, we should get going.
2
00:00:06,744 --> 00:00:09,864
Why do dresses never look as good
at home as they do in the store.
3
00:00:09,874 --> 00:00:12,094
Well it's a fact mannequins
have such great bodies.
4
00:00:16,423 --> 00:00:17,543
Yeah, I-I-i mean not that
5
00:00:17,623 --> 00:00:19,057
Forget it.
6
00:00:20,993 --> 00:00:23,161
Wait, are you
eating ice cream?
7
00:00:23,162 --> 00:00:24,896
Uh-huh.
8
00:00:24,897 --> 00:00:26,531
Adam, we're going out
to a nice dinner.
9
00:00:26,532 --> 00:00:27,899
Put it back.
10
00:00:27,900 --> 00:00:30,968
All right, mom.
11
00:00:30,969 --> 00:00:32,937
Hey honey, are you okay?
12
00:00:32,938 --> 00:00:36,207
I mean, are you sure
you wanna do this tonight?
13
00:00:36,208 --> 00:00:37,775
Of course I do.
14
00:00:37,776 --> 00:00:39,644
There's nothing
I want more than to marry you.
15
00:00:39,645 --> 00:00:41,112
I'm just nervous.
16
00:00:41,113 --> 00:00:42,647
I know.
I'm nervous too.
17
00:00:42,648 --> 00:00:45,650
That's why
I need the ice cream.
18
00:00:45,651 --> 00:00:48,753
Come here.
19
00:00:48,754 --> 00:00:49,754
It's your wedding day.
20
00:00:49,755 --> 00:00:51,756
If you want ice cream,
go nuts.
21
00:00:51,757 --> 00:00:54,058
Oh, do we have nuts?
22
00:00:54,059 --> 00:00:56,027
Don't make me
rethink tonight.
23
00:00:56,028 --> 00:00:58,096
Jeff and Audrey
are gonna be surprised, huh?
24
00:00:58,097 --> 00:00:59,630
Ah, that's the point
of doing it this way.
25
00:00:59,631 --> 00:01:01,833
Did Russell ask why you were
leaving work early?
26
00:01:01,834 --> 00:01:03,367
No, I told him I was sick.
27
00:01:03,368 --> 00:01:05,903
And he said the gay guy Mel from
accounting was sick, too,
28
00:01:05,904 --> 00:01:09,173
and he jumped to some pretty
graphic conclusions.
29
00:01:10,776 --> 00:01:13,010
Where is my dry cleaning?
30
00:01:13,011 --> 00:01:15,613
I don't know.
31
00:01:15,614 --> 00:01:18,816
Here it is.
Where's my purse?
32
00:01:18,817 --> 00:01:20,551
I don't know.
33
00:01:20,552 --> 00:01:21,953
Here it is.
34
00:01:21,954 --> 00:01:23,988
Oh, God,
where's my cell phone?
35
00:01:23,989 --> 00:01:25,356
I don't know.
36
00:01:25,357 --> 00:01:26,924
Oh, here it is.
37
00:01:26,925 --> 00:01:29,527
Hey--
hey, where's my gun?
38
00:01:29,528 --> 00:01:30,895
What?
39
00:01:30,896 --> 00:01:33,064
Nothing, I'm just tired
of the old frantic routine
40
00:01:33,065 --> 00:01:34,398
trying to get ready
to go out.
41
00:01:34,399 --> 00:01:35,566
Well, I'm sorry.
42
00:01:35,567 --> 00:01:37,401
I do a little bit more
than throw on a sport coat
43
00:01:37,402 --> 00:01:40,738
and forget
to reapply deodorant.
44
00:01:40,739 --> 00:01:42,473
Listen, this restaurant
Adam and Jen are
45
00:01:42,474 --> 00:01:43,808
taking us to is very fancy,
46
00:01:43,809 --> 00:01:45,109
and they don't have a lot
of money, okay?
47
00:01:45,110 --> 00:01:46,310
So I don't want you ordering
anything pricey.
48
00:01:46,311 --> 00:01:50,148
I got a hankerin'
for free lobster.
49
00:01:50,149 --> 00:01:51,415
No lobster.
50
00:01:51,416 --> 00:01:53,785
Fine. I'll eat that
box of pop tarts,
51
00:01:53,786 --> 00:01:56,387
that'll save 'em
the price of an appetizer.
52
00:01:56,388 --> 00:01:57,855
No, no.
We'll just--
53
00:01:57,856 --> 00:01:59,757
well, we can split a salad.
54
00:01:59,758 --> 00:02:03,461
Oh, can we?
55
00:02:03,462 --> 00:02:06,631
All right,
how do I look?
56
00:02:06,632 --> 00:02:09,767
You know.
57
00:02:09,768 --> 00:02:10,968
Why do I bother?
58
00:02:10,969 --> 00:02:13,271
Yeah, why do you?
59
00:02:15,674 --> 00:02:18,709
♪ How many ways
to say I love you? ♪
60
00:02:20,846 --> 00:02:25,583
♪ how many ways to say
that I'm not scared ♪
61
00:02:25,584 --> 00:02:27,852
♪ with you by my side ♪
62
00:02:27,853 --> 00:02:30,488
♪ there is no denying ♪
63
00:02:30,489 --> 00:02:33,791
♪ that I can't wait
for me and you ♪
64
00:02:33,801 --> 00:02:37,801
65
00:02:37,811 --> 00:02:40,811
66
00:02:42,784 --> 00:02:44,786
Hey, uh, Jen
wanted me to check to see
67
00:02:44,792 --> 00:02:46,025
if you guys were ready.
68
00:02:46,026 --> 00:02:47,260
I am,
Audrey's not.
69
00:02:47,261 --> 00:02:48,595
Well, can you
push her along?
70
00:02:48,596 --> 00:02:50,363
Can I push her along.
71
00:02:50,364 --> 00:02:52,198
It's just that tonight
is kind of important,
72
00:02:52,199 --> 00:02:53,533
and we sort of
have a schedule.
73
00:02:53,534 --> 00:02:56,069
All right, you want to try?
Go ahead.
74
00:02:57,000 --> 00:03:00,074
Subtitles downloaded from www.OpenSubtitles.org
75
00:03:02,810 --> 00:03:07,013
Dude, dude, dude.
She's wearing her underwear.
76
00:03:07,014 --> 00:03:08,648
Why the hell
did you send him in there?
77
00:03:08,649 --> 00:03:11,017
You were just dressed,
what happened?
78
00:03:11,018 --> 00:03:13,052
I decided to change.
79
00:03:13,053 --> 00:03:16,222
Can you ever for once in your
whole life ever just be helpful?
80
00:03:16,223 --> 00:03:18,224
You want helpful?
Okay, how's this?
81
00:03:18,225 --> 00:03:22,595
You look the same in everything.
I'm hungry, hurry up.
82
00:03:22,596 --> 00:03:25,165
You are such an ass.
83
00:03:25,166 --> 00:03:26,800
Maybe we just
shouldn't even go.
84
00:03:26,801 --> 00:03:29,836
Oh no, then I wouldn't
get to not have lobster
85
00:03:29,837 --> 00:03:31,771
and half a salad.
86
00:03:35,442 --> 00:03:37,277
Dude, why don't you
go without us.
87
00:03:37,278 --> 00:03:41,948
Um, she's about to turn green
and bust out of her clothes.
88
00:03:41,949 --> 00:03:43,483
She's the Hulk.
89
00:03:43,484 --> 00:03:45,852
Look, you have to come
with us tonight.
90
00:03:45,853 --> 00:03:46,953
Why?
91
00:03:46,954 --> 00:03:49,789
Well, there's
a special secret reason.
92
00:03:49,790 --> 00:03:50,857
I don't care.
93
00:03:50,858 --> 00:03:52,425
Okay! Okay, okay...
94
00:03:52,426 --> 00:03:54,227
Only if you promise
not to tell Audrey.
95
00:03:54,228 --> 00:03:55,295
I promise.
96
00:03:55,296 --> 00:03:56,863
Okay.
97
00:03:56,864 --> 00:03:58,698
Tonight, before we go
to the restaurant
98
00:03:58,699 --> 00:04:00,333
we are going to City Hall.
99
00:04:00,334 --> 00:04:01,768
Jen and I
are getting married.
100
00:04:01,769 --> 00:04:04,704
Oh, good for you, buddy!
101
00:04:04,705 --> 00:04:06,005
Oh, yeah, all right!
102
00:04:06,006 --> 00:04:07,106
Oh, Jesus.
103
00:04:15,049 --> 00:04:17,750
We're holding hands now.
104
00:04:17,751 --> 00:04:19,219
Yeah.
105
00:04:19,220 --> 00:04:20,687
Anyway, that's why
I wanted you to go.
106
00:04:20,688 --> 00:04:22,856
Why did you guys
decide to do it now?
107
00:04:22,857 --> 00:04:24,724
Well, Jen's parents
have been pressuring her
108
00:04:24,725 --> 00:04:25,892
to have this big wedding.
109
00:04:25,893 --> 00:04:27,560
And, well, you tell Jen
to do one thing,
110
00:04:27,561 --> 00:04:28,862
she's gonna do the other.
111
00:04:28,863 --> 00:04:31,431
Huh, didn't know Audrey
was selling franchises.
112
00:04:31,432 --> 00:04:32,599
Count us in.
113
00:04:32,600 --> 00:04:34,167
Great.
114
00:04:34,168 --> 00:04:36,903
Oh, remember...
don't tell Audrey.
115
00:04:36,904 --> 00:04:38,371
You got it.
116
00:04:38,372 --> 00:04:39,405
They're getting married?
117
00:04:39,406 --> 00:04:41,007
Tonight?
Yes.
118
00:04:41,008 --> 00:04:43,176
And we're the witnesses but
we're not supposed to know?
119
00:04:43,177 --> 00:04:46,145
Excellent repeating
of everything I just said.
120
00:04:46,146 --> 00:04:47,714
Oh, my God.
121
00:04:47,715 --> 00:04:50,316
I don't know what to say,
I didn't expect this.
122
00:04:50,317 --> 00:04:52,118
You didn't
win an Oscar, Audrey.
123
00:04:52,119 --> 00:04:54,721
Well, I have to change
into something nicer.
124
00:04:54,722 --> 00:04:56,389
I mean,
I am the maid of honor.
125
00:04:56,390 --> 00:04:57,523
You're married...
126
00:04:57,524 --> 00:05:00,193
So actually, you are
the matron of honor.
127
00:05:00,194 --> 00:05:01,628
You need to change, too.
128
00:05:03,297 --> 00:05:04,898
Why?
129
00:05:04,899 --> 00:05:08,735
Because it's just us,
so you're like the best man.
130
00:05:08,736 --> 00:05:12,038
Well, that's crazy ironic.
131
00:05:15,309 --> 00:05:16,509
Hello, there.
132
00:05:16,510 --> 00:05:18,444
One large chicken noodle soup
to go, please.
133
00:05:18,445 --> 00:05:19,579
Anything else?
134
00:05:19,580 --> 00:05:21,447
No, no. Just the soup
today, thank you.
135
00:05:21,448 --> 00:05:23,616
My friend's not
feeling well, see.
136
00:05:23,617 --> 00:05:27,520
Hmm! Chicken soup won't cure
what he's spreading around.
137
00:05:27,521 --> 00:05:29,989
Oh, no, no.
It's for Adam.
138
00:05:29,990 --> 00:05:31,991
Uh, F.Y.I. I'm on
some experimental pills
139
00:05:31,992 --> 00:05:36,796
from Mexico,
and so far, so bueno.
140
00:05:36,797 --> 00:05:38,064
Dude, do you
have to do this?
141
00:05:38,065 --> 00:05:39,565
We're gonna be late
for the movie.
142
00:05:39,566 --> 00:05:41,401
I don't have to do this,
I want to do this.
143
00:05:41,402 --> 00:05:42,969
Mr. Rhodes left work
feeling sick.
144
00:05:42,970 --> 00:05:44,671
Some nice hot soup
will do him well, sir.
145
00:05:44,672 --> 00:05:46,172
I mean, I can
understand if you wanna
146
00:05:46,173 --> 00:05:48,574
have sex with the guy, but-
147
00:05:48,575 --> 00:05:51,711
wait, do you want
to have sex with the guy?
148
00:05:51,712 --> 00:05:53,246
I'm just being a good friend.
149
00:05:53,247 --> 00:05:54,447
If you were a better friend,
150
00:05:54,448 --> 00:05:56,382
maybe people would
invite you out more often.
151
00:05:56,383 --> 00:05:59,485
Hmm? You ever consider that?
Hmm?
152
00:05:59,486 --> 00:06:01,287
I get invited out plenty.
153
00:06:01,288 --> 00:06:05,525
Being asked to leave doesn't
count as being invited out.
154
00:06:08,128 --> 00:06:09,662
Okay, everything's on track.
155
00:06:09,663 --> 00:06:11,631
Jeff and Audrey
are just about ready.
156
00:06:11,632 --> 00:06:13,366
Does this dress
look good on me?
157
00:06:13,367 --> 00:06:14,534
Yeah, it looks great.
158
00:06:14,535 --> 00:06:16,736
No, it doesn't.
You're insane.
159
00:06:16,737 --> 00:06:18,237
Okay, it doesn't look great.
160
00:06:18,238 --> 00:06:20,974
Oh, don't bother.
Your opinion is useless.
161
00:06:20,975 --> 00:06:23,109
I'm gonna go ask Audrey.
162
00:06:24,912 --> 00:06:27,013
Yay, I get that forever.
163
00:06:31,318 --> 00:06:32,385
Where's Audrey?
164
00:06:32,386 --> 00:06:33,753
I want to ask her how I look
in this dress.
165
00:06:33,754 --> 00:06:35,955
You look fine.
Shut up.
166
00:06:35,956 --> 00:06:39,025
Audrey is definitely
selling franchises.
167
00:06:41,395 --> 00:06:42,662
Hey.
Oh...
168
00:06:42,663 --> 00:06:44,664
You changed.
You look nice.
169
00:06:44,665 --> 00:06:46,766
Oh, how gay
of you to notice.
170
00:06:46,767 --> 00:06:50,703
Hey, Jen. I am so
excited about tonight.
171
00:06:50,704 --> 00:06:53,039
Me too. What do you think
of this dress?
172
00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:56,242
Uh...not great on the boobs.
Even worse on the arms.
173
00:06:56,243 --> 00:06:57,543
Thank you.
174
00:06:57,544 --> 00:06:59,379
Couldn't just do that,
could you?
175
00:06:59,380 --> 00:07:03,716
Fine.
You're legs look weird, too.
176
00:07:07,988 --> 00:07:09,288
But I said-
just go.
177
00:07:09,289 --> 00:07:11,824
I was trying to say--
just...go.
178
00:07:15,396 --> 00:07:16,329
Give me the key.
179
00:07:16,330 --> 00:07:19,932
Oh, hold on.
I left it inside.
180
00:07:22,703 --> 00:07:23,870
He locked us out.
181
00:07:23,871 --> 00:07:28,474
Oh, these are the times I wish
I learned magic.
182
00:07:28,475 --> 00:07:29,675
Oh, my God!
183
00:07:29,676 --> 00:07:32,545
So now I have no boobs,
giant arms, weird legs--
184
00:07:32,546 --> 00:07:33,579
I can't go out like this!
185
00:07:33,580 --> 00:07:36,449
People will think
I am a transvestite.
186
00:07:36,450 --> 00:07:39,852
That will not
reflect well on me.
187
00:07:39,853 --> 00:07:41,020
All right,
calm down.
188
00:07:41,021 --> 00:07:42,622
You can borrow
something of mine.
189
00:07:42,623 --> 00:07:44,357
Thank you.
190
00:07:46,393 --> 00:07:47,927
So, you've been
dealing with this
191
00:07:47,928 --> 00:07:50,797
"getting ready to go out" drama
for like 14 years.
192
00:07:50,798 --> 00:07:52,765
Oh, yeah.
How do you handle it?
193
00:07:52,766 --> 00:07:55,201
I have developed
a pretty effective method.
194
00:07:55,202 --> 00:07:56,803
I'll show you.
195
00:08:00,174 --> 00:08:03,109
Want me
to show you again?
196
00:08:03,110 --> 00:08:04,343
Nah, it's okay,
I got it.
197
00:08:04,344 --> 00:08:06,312
Let me
show you again.
198
00:08:10,484 --> 00:08:13,186
Oh, hey, uh...didn't
we give you a spare key
199
00:08:13,187 --> 00:08:14,987
that time we went out of town
a while back?
200
00:08:14,988 --> 00:08:16,389
Oh, you sure did.
201
00:08:16,390 --> 00:08:18,324
I never told you this,
but, uh, that week,
202
00:08:18,325 --> 00:08:21,594
Audrey had me
use your toilet.
203
00:08:21,595 --> 00:08:23,930
Anyway, I can't remember
if it was
204
00:08:23,931 --> 00:08:25,698
before or after
we changed our lock,
205
00:08:25,699 --> 00:08:27,400
but could you get the key?
I'll give it a try.
206
00:08:27,401 --> 00:08:30,803
Yeah, uh...you still have
that, uh, bottle of scotch
207
00:08:30,804 --> 00:08:32,371
that I gave you
for your birthday?
208
00:08:32,372 --> 00:08:33,473
Yeah, yeah.
All right.
209
00:08:33,474 --> 00:08:35,975
If this key works,
bring it back.
210
00:08:35,976 --> 00:08:37,176
But that was a gift.
211
00:08:37,177 --> 00:08:38,711
Look, you've had it
for three weeks,
212
00:08:38,712 --> 00:08:41,848
it's public domain.
213
00:08:42,683 --> 00:08:45,618
Stupid key.
214
00:08:45,619 --> 00:08:47,386
This dumb door.
215
00:08:50,157 --> 00:08:51,757
Mr. Rhodes?
216
00:08:51,758 --> 00:08:53,059
Oh, hey, Timmy.
Russell.
217
00:08:53,060 --> 00:08:54,694
I thought you were sick.
218
00:08:54,695 --> 00:08:55,862
I am.
219
00:08:57,731 --> 00:08:59,132
Why are you
all dressed up?
220
00:08:59,133 --> 00:09:00,766
Okay, Russell.
You were right.
221
00:09:00,767 --> 00:09:03,669
I'm going out
with Mel from accounting.
222
00:09:07,174 --> 00:09:09,442
All right, worst liar ever,
what's going on?
223
00:09:09,443 --> 00:09:10,910
I can't tell you.
224
00:09:10,911 --> 00:09:12,578
Really? What if I
stare at you like this?
225
00:09:12,579 --> 00:09:14,780
Okay, okay, okay.
226
00:09:14,781 --> 00:09:16,616
I'll tell you the truth.
227
00:09:16,617 --> 00:09:18,384
Jen and I are going out
with Jeff and Audrey.
228
00:09:18,385 --> 00:09:20,486
Hm, doesn't
seem that clandestine.
229
00:09:20,487 --> 00:09:24,023
Yeah, if clandestine
means not boring.
230
00:09:24,024 --> 00:09:25,291
What's the big cover-up?
231
00:09:25,292 --> 00:09:27,627
Well, before dinner...
232
00:09:27,628 --> 00:09:33,065
Um, we are having
an intervention
233
00:09:33,066 --> 00:09:35,468
for Jeff's drinking.
234
00:09:35,469 --> 00:09:38,804
Makes sense.
No surprise there.
235
00:09:45,628 --> 00:09:46,662
all right,
what about this one?
236
00:09:47,198 --> 00:09:51,568
Ooh, I don't know.
It's a little dated.
237
00:09:51,569 --> 00:09:53,804
Oh...yeah, that one's been
in there a while.
238
00:09:53,805 --> 00:09:55,305
The tags are still on.
239
00:09:55,306 --> 00:09:59,109
Yeah, I bought it years ago,
never wore it.
240
00:09:59,110 --> 00:10:00,778
This store
opened last month.
241
00:10:00,779 --> 00:10:02,813
Okay. Would you
just pick a dress?
242
00:10:02,814 --> 00:10:06,350
Well, I don't know
about any of these.
243
00:10:06,351 --> 00:10:08,719
Well, then, stick
with what you have on.
244
00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:10,087
It looks great.
245
00:10:10,088 --> 00:10:12,122
We can hide it with a shawl.
246
00:10:12,123 --> 00:10:15,292
No, no. I can't.
Tonight's just too important.
247
00:10:15,293 --> 00:10:18,295
I know.
I mean, it's dinner.
248
00:10:18,296 --> 00:10:20,764
It's a very important meal.
249
00:10:20,765 --> 00:10:22,066
I guess.
250
00:10:23,935 --> 00:10:26,637
Oh, there is
actually one dress
251
00:10:26,638 --> 00:10:27,971
that I think
would work for me.
252
00:10:27,972 --> 00:10:29,740
Okay, good.
Which one?
253
00:10:29,741 --> 00:10:31,742
Well, actually.
It's the one you're wearing.
254
00:10:31,743 --> 00:10:34,011
I've always loved it.
255
00:10:34,012 --> 00:10:35,746
Oh, but I--
no, you're right.
256
00:10:35,747 --> 00:10:38,382
Forget it.
It's way too much to ask.
257
00:10:38,383 --> 00:10:41,251
No, you know what?
It isn't.
258
00:10:41,252 --> 00:10:43,053
Here.
Unzip me.
259
00:10:44,823 --> 00:10:47,057
Yes.
260
00:10:47,058 --> 00:10:49,293
Unzip her.
261
00:10:51,696 --> 00:10:53,197
What are you doing?
262
00:10:53,198 --> 00:10:55,099
I was on my way
to the bathroom
263
00:10:55,100 --> 00:11:00,104
when I stumbled upon
this delightful tableau.
264
00:11:04,476 --> 00:11:06,243
Big surprise
we weren't invited
265
00:11:06,244 --> 00:11:07,544
to Mr. Bingham's
intervention.
266
00:11:07,545 --> 00:11:10,547
Thank you very much.
267
00:11:10,548 --> 00:11:12,950
Why do you want to go
to an intervention, anyway?
268
00:11:12,951 --> 00:11:16,887
Are they serving
chicken tikka masala?
269
00:11:16,888 --> 00:11:18,822
No.
270
00:11:18,823 --> 00:11:22,326
Lamb?
271
00:11:22,327 --> 00:11:24,695
No, I would want to do it
to help a friend.
272
00:11:24,696 --> 00:11:26,263
But thanks to
my association with you,
273
00:11:26,264 --> 00:11:28,365
I've been excluded
from doing something of value,
274
00:11:28,366 --> 00:11:30,234
and instead I'm going to see-
275
00:11:30,235 --> 00:11:32,369
what film did you choose again?
Stewardess School Blues.
276
00:11:32,370 --> 00:11:35,038
Oh, Stewardess School Blues.
277
00:11:35,039 --> 00:11:39,309
Sounds in keeping with your,
"no boobie, no watchie" policy.
278
00:11:39,310 --> 00:11:41,945
Yeah, I guess it's
about a bunch of chicks
279
00:11:41,946 --> 00:11:43,447
who are studying
to be stewardesses
280
00:11:43,448 --> 00:11:45,983
and then they
get sad about something.
281
00:11:45,984 --> 00:11:49,086
But you gotta figure
they get cheered up, right?
282
00:11:49,087 --> 00:11:51,922
I don't care.
I don't want to see it.
283
00:11:51,923 --> 00:11:55,559
In fact,
we're not going to see a movie.
284
00:11:55,560 --> 00:11:57,094
We're going back
to help our friends.
285
00:11:57,095 --> 00:11:58,795
Aw, come on.
286
00:11:58,796 --> 00:12:03,133
It got three stars
from boing.com.
287
00:12:03,134 --> 00:12:04,501
They're tough.
288
00:12:06,704 --> 00:12:08,472
All right, I think we're
all ready.
289
00:12:08,473 --> 00:12:10,774
Whoa, look at you,
you look smokin' hot.
290
00:12:10,775 --> 00:12:13,043
I mean, really gorgeous.
291
00:12:13,044 --> 00:12:15,812
Um, that's my dress, Jeff.
292
00:12:15,813 --> 00:12:18,182
Not anymore.
293
00:12:18,183 --> 00:12:21,051
All right,
how do I look in this one?
294
00:12:21,052 --> 00:12:25,322
You know.
295
00:12:25,323 --> 00:12:26,957
That was really rude, Jeff.
296
00:12:26,958 --> 00:12:30,827
But thank you.
297
00:12:30,828 --> 00:12:32,596
What did you say, beer?
298
00:12:32,597 --> 00:12:34,731
Why, yes,
I will come and drink you.
299
00:12:39,537 --> 00:12:40,871
What are you guys
doing here?
300
00:12:40,872 --> 00:12:43,807
I don't know.
Ask the Indian Mr. Rogers.
301
00:12:46,911 --> 00:12:48,445
Mr. Rhodes...
302
00:12:48,446 --> 00:12:49,880
Now, I realize
we weren't invited,
303
00:12:49,881 --> 00:12:52,049
but I'd like to offer
my help as a friend.
304
00:12:52,050 --> 00:12:55,285
With the intervention.
305
00:12:57,722 --> 00:13:01,158
With the what?
306
00:13:01,159 --> 00:13:03,794
The intervention?
307
00:13:03,795 --> 00:13:05,929
Oh, yeah, that.
308
00:13:05,930 --> 00:13:07,030
Yes, I'll have you know,
309
00:13:07,031 --> 00:13:08,632
I do have experience
in these matters.
310
00:13:08,633 --> 00:13:10,200
In fact, I facilitated
an intervention
311
00:13:10,201 --> 00:13:11,602
back in my days
at the University.
312
00:13:14,072 --> 00:13:16,974
Man, you have
a sick vocabulary.
313
00:13:16,975 --> 00:13:18,041
Yeah, yeah.
314
00:13:18,042 --> 00:13:20,711
I bet you're great
at that, um...
315
00:13:20,712 --> 00:13:23,914
what's that game
with all the words?
316
00:13:23,915 --> 00:13:25,582
Scrabble?
317
00:13:25,583 --> 00:13:27,484
Hey, you're the word guy.
318
00:13:33,224 --> 00:13:34,258
Hey.
319
00:13:34,259 --> 00:13:35,792
Hey, what are
you doing here?
320
00:13:35,793 --> 00:13:38,262
Uh, me and Timmy
just stopped by,
321
00:13:38,263 --> 00:13:40,464
you know,
as friends will do.
322
00:13:40,465 --> 00:13:43,166
So...going to dinner?
323
00:13:43,167 --> 00:13:45,235
Well, it's not really
just dinner.
324
00:13:45,236 --> 00:13:49,306
Oh, you know.
Yeah.
325
00:13:49,307 --> 00:13:51,441
Yeah. Do you?
326
00:13:51,442 --> 00:13:53,143
Yeah.
327
00:13:53,144 --> 00:13:54,077
You're cool with it?
328
00:13:54,078 --> 00:13:57,914
To the extent
that I give a crap.
329
00:13:57,915 --> 00:14:02,185
Hey, we all knew it was gonna
happen sooner or later.
330
00:14:02,186 --> 00:14:04,688
Ah, well, think
it will make a difference?
331
00:14:04,689 --> 00:14:08,191
Nah,
nothing's gonna change.
332
00:14:08,192 --> 00:14:11,228
It'll be a big to-do,
Audrey will cry.
333
00:14:11,229 --> 00:14:14,965
Then it's back
to the same old, same old.
334
00:14:14,966 --> 00:14:16,133
Jeff, wait.
335
00:14:16,134 --> 00:14:17,934
Do you really think
you should be drinking-
336
00:14:17,935 --> 00:14:20,637
ooh, pop tarts.
337
00:14:20,638 --> 00:14:21,772
All right.
338
00:14:21,773 --> 00:14:23,307
Oh, great.
We are all finally ready.
339
00:14:23,308 --> 00:14:24,374
Let's hit it.
340
00:14:24,375 --> 00:14:26,576
Yeah.
But first, a toast.
341
00:14:26,577 --> 00:14:28,578
A toast?
342
00:14:31,049 --> 00:14:33,183
Yeah, Jeff do
we have some champagne?
343
00:14:33,184 --> 00:14:35,986
I may have a bottle hidden
away somewhere.
344
00:14:35,987 --> 00:14:37,854
I bet you do.
345
00:14:37,855 --> 00:14:40,824
Go get it.
346
00:14:40,825 --> 00:14:42,893
Mrs. Bingham,
are you sure this is wise?
347
00:14:42,894 --> 00:14:44,528
Wise?
Who cares about wise?
348
00:14:44,529 --> 00:14:46,963
Let's get our drink on, Timmy.
349
00:14:46,964 --> 00:14:48,832
Mrs. Bingham,
you're enabling him.
350
00:14:48,833 --> 00:14:51,702
Um, actually
I'm enabling all of us
351
00:14:51,703 --> 00:14:52,803
to have a really good time.
352
00:14:54,272 --> 00:14:58,875
Jeff gets really grouchy
if he loses his buzz.
353
00:14:58,876 --> 00:15:01,111
Found a bottle.
354
00:15:01,112 --> 00:15:03,780
Well, what's everybody else
gonna drink?
355
00:15:06,818 --> 00:15:08,819
Mr. Rhodes, I don't understand
what's happening here.
356
00:15:08,820 --> 00:15:12,789
Oh, he's saying he's gonna
drink the whole bottle himself.
357
00:15:12,790 --> 00:15:15,659
No, what I meant was--
okay, look, nevermind.
358
00:15:15,660 --> 00:15:17,394
All right,
listen up.
359
00:15:17,395 --> 00:15:20,230
We all know what's really
happening tonight.
360
00:15:20,231 --> 00:15:22,432
They do?
Adam did you tell them?
361
00:15:22,433 --> 00:15:23,767
Yes, he did.
362
00:15:23,768 --> 00:15:25,035
And it's a good thing I came
363
00:15:25,036 --> 00:15:27,237
because you're all
shockingly bad at this.
364
00:15:29,674 --> 00:15:31,241
So if I may...
365
00:15:31,242 --> 00:15:35,379
Mr. Bingham,
this is an intervention.
366
00:15:35,380 --> 00:15:38,582
Your drinking
is destroying your life.
367
00:15:38,583 --> 00:15:42,486
You're hurting yourself, you're
hurting those closest to you.
368
00:15:42,487 --> 00:15:44,721
And I want you to know,
we're all here tonight
369
00:15:44,722 --> 00:15:47,657
to confront you
with love and compassion.
370
00:15:47,658 --> 00:15:49,426
Everyone!
371
00:15:53,765 --> 00:15:56,666
Everyone.
372
00:15:58,603 --> 00:16:00,203
Still just me?
373
00:16:00,204 --> 00:16:02,005
Okay, what the hell
is going on?
374
00:16:02,006 --> 00:16:04,841
Okay, okay.
Here's what happened.
375
00:16:04,842 --> 00:16:07,544
Timmy, get off Jeff.
376
00:16:07,545 --> 00:16:11,248
I ran into Russell and Timmy,
and in order to not tell them
377
00:16:11,249 --> 00:16:13,683
we're getting married tonight,
I told them that we're having
378
00:16:13,684 --> 00:16:15,252
an intervention
for Jeff's drinking.
379
00:16:15,253 --> 00:16:18,855
Oh, I'd buy that.
Good thinking.
380
00:16:18,856 --> 00:16:20,791
Wait, you're
getting married tonight?
381
00:16:20,792 --> 00:16:22,426
Yeah,
I'm the maid of honor.
382
00:16:22,427 --> 00:16:25,462
Matron.
How about widow?
383
00:16:25,463 --> 00:16:27,898
You told Audrey?
No, I only told Jeff.
384
00:16:27,899 --> 00:16:28,999
I told Audrey.
385
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:30,167
You weren't supposed
to tell her.
386
00:16:30,168 --> 00:16:31,368
You weren't supposed
to tell me.
387
00:16:31,369 --> 00:16:33,770
You weren't supposed
to tell anybody.
388
00:16:37,175 --> 00:16:40,477
Congrats, though.
389
00:16:40,478 --> 00:16:43,113
So what are you
going to wear?
390
00:16:43,114 --> 00:16:44,881
Okay, that's it.
391
00:16:44,882 --> 00:16:47,350
This was supposed
to be a fun surprise,
392
00:16:47,351 --> 00:16:48,985
but the night's
turning into a disaster.
393
00:16:48,986 --> 00:16:50,253
I'm not wearing my own dress.
394
00:16:50,254 --> 00:16:51,588
Adam has ice cream on his tie.
395
00:16:51,589 --> 00:16:55,325
Not from tonight, though,
just to defend myself.
396
00:16:55,326 --> 00:16:56,426
And if you think about it,
397
00:16:56,427 --> 00:16:58,161
why do we even have
to do this at all?
398
00:16:58,162 --> 00:17:00,030
What do you mean?
399
00:17:00,031 --> 00:17:01,798
Well, we love each other,
we have a great thing.
400
00:17:01,799 --> 00:17:03,300
Why do we have to go through
all the trouble
401
00:17:03,301 --> 00:17:05,702
to make it official?
Who cares?
402
00:17:05,703 --> 00:17:07,804
I know I don't.
403
00:17:11,075 --> 00:17:12,375
Are you sure?
404
00:17:12,376 --> 00:17:15,846
I'm 100% sure
I do not care.
405
00:17:15,847 --> 00:17:17,347
Let's just go home.
406
00:17:17,348 --> 00:17:19,015
Okay.
407
00:17:19,016 --> 00:17:21,785
Well, I guess we're
just gonna call it a night.
408
00:17:21,786 --> 00:17:23,253
No, no, no,
hold on a second here.
409
00:17:23,254 --> 00:17:25,322
We're not just gonna
call it a night.
410
00:17:26,991 --> 00:17:30,360
You wanna have
the intervention?
411
00:17:30,361 --> 00:17:32,529
No. Look.
412
00:17:32,530 --> 00:17:36,933
Maybe this is the scotch
talking, or possibly the beer,
413
00:17:36,934 --> 00:17:40,203
or that wine cooler I found in
my sports bag this morning,
414
00:17:40,204 --> 00:17:44,074
guys, are we sure we don't
wanna have this intervention?
415
00:17:44,075 --> 00:17:47,410
Look, I think you guys
should get married tonight.
416
00:17:47,411 --> 00:17:49,546
Maybe I'm old fashioned,
but I think people
417
00:17:49,547 --> 00:17:51,348
who are living together
should be married.
418
00:17:51,349 --> 00:17:54,351
You feel different, you know?
You become a team.
419
00:17:54,352 --> 00:17:55,852
Working together.
420
00:17:55,853 --> 00:17:59,589
He's right, it's like--
Audrey, not now, please.
421
00:17:59,590 --> 00:18:01,391
You guys both know
what a pain in the ass it is
422
00:18:01,392 --> 00:18:03,026
to meet somebody
and get them to like you.
423
00:18:03,027 --> 00:18:05,095
You guys are lucky
that you found each other.
424
00:18:05,096 --> 00:18:10,300
So let's just lock this in,
and do it, and stop annoying me.
425
00:18:10,301 --> 00:18:14,671
I'm kind of on Jeff's side--
you know what Audrey, please.
426
00:18:14,672 --> 00:18:17,107
Can we still make it
to City Hall in time?
427
00:18:17,108 --> 00:18:19,209
Well it's gonna be tight,
but we can make it.
428
00:18:19,210 --> 00:18:21,378
Let's go.
429
00:18:21,379 --> 00:18:23,880
Ay, ay, ay.
430
00:18:23,881 --> 00:18:25,181
See, sir?
431
00:18:25,182 --> 00:18:27,284
Doesn't helping friends feel
better than watching
432
00:18:27,285 --> 00:18:30,253
jiggly flight attendants
bounce up and down?
433
00:18:32,290 --> 00:18:36,626
I feel I've answered
my own question.
434
00:18:36,627 --> 00:18:37,994
To Adam and Jen.
435
00:18:37,995 --> 00:18:39,996
Hear, hear! Cheers!
436
00:18:41,465 --> 00:18:43,700
And I want to thank Jeff for
making the great speech
437
00:18:43,701 --> 00:18:45,602
that pushed us to follow through
with our plan
438
00:18:45,603 --> 00:18:48,238
to get married tonight.
It's ironic.
439
00:18:48,239 --> 00:18:49,739
If he hadn't taken so much time
with his speech,
440
00:18:49,740 --> 00:18:53,777
we might have made it
to City Hall in time.
441
00:18:53,778 --> 00:18:55,412
But, if he hadn't
made the speech
442
00:18:55,413 --> 00:18:57,247
you wouldn't have
even tried to--
443
00:18:57,248 --> 00:18:58,982
never mind.
444
00:18:58,983 --> 00:19:00,083
Well, I'm happy.
445
00:19:00,084 --> 00:19:01,818
This just buys Adam more time
to bail.
446
00:19:01,819 --> 00:19:03,820
Not gonna happen, buddy.
447
00:19:03,821 --> 00:19:06,656
Well, that's what my dad said
when I asked him
448
00:19:06,657 --> 00:19:08,325
if he was gonna
bail on my mom
449
00:19:08,326 --> 00:19:13,163
and sure enough--
450
00:19:13,164 --> 00:19:15,765
Maybe next time you'll decide
to have a real wedding.
451
00:19:15,766 --> 00:19:17,434
That was a good day.
452
00:19:17,435 --> 00:19:18,635
Oh.
453
00:19:18,636 --> 00:19:20,570
This one here,
she looked like a movie star.
454
00:19:20,571 --> 00:19:22,105
Aww.
Hmm-hmm!
455
00:19:22,106 --> 00:19:23,540
You see?
456
00:19:23,541 --> 00:19:25,976
All of you
who constantly ask me why?
457
00:19:25,977 --> 00:19:28,044
Every so often he steps up.
458
00:19:28,045 --> 00:19:31,715
I didn't say
what movie star.
459
00:19:31,716 --> 00:19:32,882
That's okay, Jeff.
460
00:19:32,883 --> 00:19:35,986
Ernest Borgnine's
a movie star.
461
00:19:35,987 --> 00:19:37,287
Shut up.
462
00:19:37,288 --> 00:19:40,123
Okay, I've got four
diet cokes, one lemonade,
463
00:19:40,124 --> 00:19:41,758
and a scotch rocks.
464
00:19:41,759 --> 00:19:42,859
Scotch?
465
00:19:42,860 --> 00:19:44,561
Who knew the diner
served booze?
466
00:19:44,562 --> 00:19:47,464
I did.
467
00:19:52,488 --> 00:19:53,655
But we didn't even
get married.
468
00:19:53,656 --> 00:19:55,190
I know, I just want
to practice carrying you
469
00:19:55,191 --> 00:19:56,324
across the threshold.
470
00:19:56,325 --> 00:19:58,026
Good thing the super
had another key.
471
00:19:58,027 --> 00:19:59,794
All right, here it goes.
Okay.
472
00:19:59,795 --> 00:20:02,197
Oof!
Come on.
473
00:20:02,198 --> 00:20:04,466
All right, it's not working.
Hold on.
474
00:20:04,467 --> 00:20:05,500
Ow!
475
00:20:05,501 --> 00:20:06,768
Ow!
476
00:20:06,769 --> 00:20:08,537
Okay, stop it!
Put me down!
477
00:20:08,538 --> 00:20:11,039
Okay!
478
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:14,609
--
479
00:20:15,000 --> 00:20:18,130
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